How to Deal With Unexpected Additional Child Support Expenses

Child support is only a baseline. What about all those other additional expenses that come along with raising a child such as school uniforms and supplies and so on?  Matthew Brickman and Sydney Mitchell discuss how those who pay child support can economize and manage these additional child support expenses and how they are negotiated and split among two parties in Mediation Agreements for Divorce & Paternity.

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Matthew Brickman is a Florida Supreme Court certified family and appellate mediator who has worked in the 15th and 19th Judicial Circuit Courts since 2009 and 2006 respectively. But what makes him qualified to speak on the subject of conflict resolution is his own personal experience with divorce.

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Matthew Brickman
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Mediator 20836CFA
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ABOUT MATTHEW BRICKMAN:
Matthew Brickman is a Supreme Court of Florida certified county civil family mediator who has worked in the 15th and 19th Judicial Circuit Courts since 2009 and 2006 respectively. He is also an appellate certified mediator who mediates a variety of small claims, civil, and family cases. Mr. Brickman recently graduated both the Harvard Business School Negotiation Mastery Program and the Negotiation Master Class at Harvard Law School.

Transcript

Mediate This!: 0:00

Hi, my name is Sydney Mitchell. Hi, I'm Matthew Brickman, Florida Supreme court mediator. Welcome to the Mediate This! Podcast where we discuss everything mediation and conflict resolution.

Sydney Mitchell: 0:13

In our previous episode, if you had the chance to listen to that one, we started discussing, uh, the additional child support related expenses that are included in a mediation agreement for paternity. And now Matthew, let's just continue that conversation. Now we're in the next section. Last thing we talked about was coronavirus cares, act and stimulus, uh, dealing with that new component of the agreement and, uh, I guess take us into the next section here.

Matthew Brickman: 0:39

Okay. Right. So as, as you stated, whether it's a divorce or a paternity agreement, you know, we've got our child related expenses that are in addition to baseline child support. Um, so, um, one of the things that we deal with and, um, it, you know, anybody that has kids or any child of divorce, and I'm sure to Sydney, even you, um, you know, there's school uniforms and school supplies is, can be a pretty hefty cost. Um, especially now that like, you know, schools are saying, Hey, you know, we need tissues and we need toilet paper. And it's like, you know, you know, there's been so much budget cuts from the government, or now they're relying on the parents to provide like just, you know, tissues and toilet paper and not just your pencils, your backpacks, your notebooks.

Sydney Mitchell: 1:28

Yeah. And it's still funny, you know, as we were looking through this document earlier today, I saw this in the agreement and I guess I was just shocked to see it in there. I guess for me, school supplies is always, you know, just something quick we pick up and, and, you know, as you're saying, it does totally add up, I guess, as a child, it just doesn't occur to you, you know, how much, uh, costs this stuff can acquire. And, um, yeah, I just, as a child, never would've considered that this would be something that, that mothers and fathers are having to negotiate, um, and split the cost

Matthew Brickman: 2:00

For. Yeah. And, and, you know, back in the day, um, a lot of people said, Hey, you know what? Yeah, that's part of child support. I give you child support. You buy that. Not really. I mean, this is a huge expense. I mean, yeah, yeah. I

Sydney Mitchell: 2:17

Would probably honestly think the same thing before having this conversation. So I'm glad that I'm glad to, to kind of delve into this a little bit more.

Matthew Brickman: 2:24

Yeah. And so, and so, I mean now not, not all agreements have it, I have it in my agreements because I know the reality. I mean, especially being, you know, a single parent raising my kids, having that agreement. Like, I mean, honestly, Sydney, I think like, you know, now, you know, as of the date of recording this, my kids are 25 and 29. Right. So it's been a while, you know, I got divorced and you know, so, yeah. But, but just to put it into perspective though, right. When I had my kids and I was to do school uniforms and school supplies and keep in mind, they were at public school, we're not talking, you know, private school uniform, we're talking public school. They still had to wear a, a, a polo shirt that had an emblem of the school on it. Right. And the schools and the school would sell them. Um, here's a little tip for everybody. Um, what we did because I was a single dad, um, you know, not getting the child support that was ordered, but still neither here, nor there, even if you are, it's still expensive. Right. So instead of buying directly from the school, we would hit the sales, um, on that, on tax-free week that they would always have, like, you know, before tax free weekend was great. Right. And we would go to, to like Bell's, or we would go to TJ Maxx or Marshall's, or old Navy always had great deals. And we would pick up the colors that we knew were approved by the school, like white, red, blue, dark blue. Yeah. So you, the basic colors. And then, um, in south Florida, at least there's, there's a company called, and this is not a plug for them. I don't know them. I'm just trying to, this is who we use, but there was a company called embroider me and they, it was cool city. They had all the logos for all of the schools. And so, yeah. And so we would, we would hit the sale on the shirts and get the shirts for, you know,$5,$7, whatever. And then a broiler broiler may charge like$5. This was a while ago. I don't know what their costs are, 20, 21, but they would charge like$5 to put an emblem on a shirt that's low cost. And the other thing to anybody that has kids knows the kids, number one, grow, and they grow out of it pretty fast, depending on what year you're talking. The other thing is, kids are not paying attention and they're getting glue and food and dirt. And I mean, they'll reel in a shirt. And if you're buying a directly from the school, which five by the school, if you want, I couldn't afford it. But if you want to, you know how often you're replacing those and Sydney, remember in the parenting plan, under shared parental responsibility, we have that each parent will provide the child with their own set of school in play clothes in his or her own home. Right. Well, that means that they've got to have quite a lot. You can't just have like three of them and the kid goes back and forth. Like you've got to have your own. So it is a low cost option. Now, as my kids got older, we found a better solution. Okay. Even cheaper than 10 bucks. Yes. Okay. So in, in Florida, we have an in, in, in, in a lot of states, you have elementary school and you have middle school, then you have high school. Right. Well, so let's say for example, that you have a child that's in fifth grade, they're about to get out of elementary school and go to middle school. They have all of their shirts for the school for elementary, but now they're going to middle. What do you think mom and dad does with all of those shirts? They take them to the local thrift store,

Sydney Mitchell: 6:24

Given to a Goodwill or something like

Matthew Brickman: 6:25

That. Goodwill, thrift store. We would hit the threshold. We'd get them for like 75 cents, no luck. Right. It's so, and so, and Goodwill's not going to take something that's ripped, torn, stained, stretched out, like, right. And so, and so as, as the kids transition from, okay, we're no longer going to this elementary school now we're going to middle school. Okay. What do we do with all the elementary school shirts, mom and dad take them to the thrift store. I'm going to come in there. I'm going to pick them up for 75 cents to a dollar. I

Sydney Mitchell: 6:56

Mean, or even if you're a parent and you have, you know, your family, friends with other families that go to the same school, Hey, your kid's moving on. And, and you know what, and, and,

Matthew Brickman: 7:07

And sometimes I got that too.

Sydney Mitchell: 7:09

Yeah. I'm sure some parents would be totally happy just giving them away.

Matthew Brickman: 7:12

Oh yeah. Yeah. I mean for them, I mean, cause look, if Goodwill is selling them for 75 cents, what are you getting a quarter for him? Yeah. Pay it forward with your, with your friends and family. The only thing Sydney like, like, like we never did that. Even though I had lots and lots of friends and made friends with the moms and stuff at the school, the difference though, was, you know, just kids are different sizes at different ages. You know, these names, I don't know what they're putting in the food, but these, these kids are bigger than me coming out of middle school and five nine, and I'm looking up to them going high. And I was like, oh, you know, so in any case, these are, these are just great solutions, but we do deal with that. So beginning of the year uniforms and school supplies, so whatever is on that school supply list. So, you know, the school's released the list and then, you know, you, um, I mean, I've seen him like in Walmart when you walk in and you know, they have a whole little band and you just look for your school's list and that grade, then you have to get all the school supplies on that right there. And so it says beginning of this school year uniforms and school spots. So that's just the beginning of the year. Once they, when I've been, we had as well as mutually agreed upon extra uniforms and or school supplies necessary throughout the school year, we'll be divided either 50 50 or, um, pro-rata generally, since this is not part of child support, it's not even statutory. This generally is always just a 50 50 swipe. It's just what it is. It's not, pro-rata, it's not, the dad makes more money than moms or dad pays more. Noah they're both. These are their, the kids have to go to school, their school supplies, they're splitting the cost 50 50. And then guess what Sydney, just like we talked about in the previous episode, um, about payment, the payment is still the same within 14 days of pay the expense, the party who paid the expense before to the other party proves that they made the payment and provide a copy of the receipt. And then the other party reimburses within 14 days, if you don't give the receipt within 14 days, you waive your right for reimbursement. If you don't reimburse within 14 days, it's contemptible through, um, through a court proceeding. But at least we addressed that additional cost. Right? Okay. Next we've got mutually agreed upon extracurricular activities, uniforms, and equipment.

Sydney Mitchell: 9:44

Imagine this is where it starts to get expensive when your children are doing three different sports and art club. And absolutely sure adds up fast.

Matthew Brickman: 9:53

And it's interesting to each parent's different point of view regarding extracurricular. You know, for example, um, my ex wife did extracurricular. Um, when she was younger, I did not. Now I didn't do it because number one, I really wasn't, you know, football, baseball, basketball. I really didn't care about any of that stuff, but guess what? I cared about computers. And so I was doing computers while everyone else was running around as a kid, I'm doing computers and you know, all of that has helped me in that, you know, I run a virtual company and I do everything on a computer. Yeah. I mean, people say all the time, I was like, wow, you can run circles around people on a computer. Yeah. Cause I, that, that was my chosen and quote unquote extra-curriculum, you know, growing up was learning computer inside now. Um, but, but like, like I'll never forget this one mediation. I had Sydney, uh, when I was still in the courthouse. So when I first started my career as a mediator and we spent, I think it was seven and a half hours talking about this paragraph and only this paragraph, we had two attorneys, myself, the mother and the father, and then both the mom and the dad both brought their mothers to mediation. And we were going around and run for seven and a half hours talking about mutually agreed upon extra productivity. And here's why it took so long. Dad played football. He was on track for a scholarship full-blown scholarship to college, except in high school, he got in a car accident and got hurt and could no longer play. Mom is highly concerned about the child's education, wants the child to get a good education. Dad was trying to live vicariously through the child. He didn't make it, but he was going to make sure his kid made it right. So dad didn't care about the kid's grades. It was all about training, running donors go into to go into practice. And so he wanted that kid in there, period. End of story. Mom was like, look, you know, if his grades are good, you know, whatnot, fine. We went round and round and round and round and round for hours, hours now, seven and a half. And finally even got the moms involved in the mediation, brought them in because they were not allowed to be sitting there in the mediation. Finally brought that in to be the voice of reason to both of their children. It was so funny because when the, when, when the father's mother found out what he was doing, she started yelling at him because she was like, that's my grandbaby. No, my grandbaby was going to get an education. If he happens to play football and he's like, boom, shut up. This is my mediation. And the two of them, the mom, and it was, it was so comical because the both, and she was the voice of reason going you're doing what? No, I agree with these two. The other thing is, you know, these two would never marry. So they didn't, they, you know, they, they had dated, had a kid, it was a paternity agreement, never married. Um, so what we ended up doing was we built in parameters. You know, dad gets to choose the fall sport. Mom gets to choose the spring sport. The child will be put in at least one sport per season. We defined seasons. Um, then we put in, okay, but only if the child's grades are, are, you know, a certain GPA. And so we really, really customized it for that particular thing. Gosh,

Sydney Mitchell: 13:48

I hope this child had a little bit of a say in what extra could go. He was involved in, I'm sitting here thinking, well, what does he want to do?

Matthew Brickman: 13:55

And, and so, so what I tell parents all the time is this, you know, and like, like my kids really did not get to do extracurricular activities. They didn't get to do them. Not because I didn't want them to, or because they, but, or, or they wanted or didn't want to. But number one, I didn't have the time I was a single dad raising my kids, had to pick my kids up. I was having to work. I didn't have the time for that. I didn't have babysitters. I didn't have family around. I didn't have the village to help me raise the child. Right. The other thing is Sydney. I didn't have the money, you know, and sometimes I tell people, I said, you know, sometimes you simply have to tell your child, no, I'm sorry. We don't have the money. Like why? You know, because a child to be raised thinking that anything and everything they ever want, they're going to get really is a huge disservice to that child. Because when that child actually enters into the real world and if a boss or a teacher or whatnot tells that child, no, they can't. And yet they've always been entitled and had it, you're setting the child up for failure. Like the child needs to understand the word now, like, I love you and yes, we can do this, but no, we can't do this that's reality like you. And I said, they do not get to do everything that we want to do when we want to do it as adults. Like, that's just not the real world. And so sometimes it's like, look, no. And it's simply because we, you know, we can't afford it. Now. Those types of conversations I had with my kids a lot. And it was, I would love for you to do it, but I cannot afford to do it at this time. And if, if, look, if, if, if my kids had come to me and said, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please. I really, really, really want it. We would have figured something out, whether it is look next season, you know, I, you know, you and I look, um, I'm I'm to put away, you know, X amount of dollars so that you can do it because I know it's really important to you, but look, we're the parents, you know, now do the kids have an opinion? Absolutely. Um, I tell parties all the time, the court says, look, you know, or the court's viewpoint attitude or whatnot is children have an opinion, but they do not have a say where the adults we're the ones making the rules were the ones setting up the parenting plan and all of this stuff. We need to listen to our kids. We need to understand what they're wanting, what they're not. I mean, you know, I don't know if that kid even liked football, but dad had an in football and who knows if that kid was doing it, just because it pleased his dad and he didn't want his dad to be let down, or maybe, you know, he didn't want his dad to yell at him. Like, I don't know, like, but you know, it's important to talk to the kids, find out what they want, what they don't want, what they like, what they don't like, but ultimately, you know, the parents or the parents making that decision. So with extra curricular, it says the cost of the mutually agreed upon extracurricular uniforms and equipment shall be divided generally. Again, this is 50 50. This is not pro-rata. This is not based on their incomes. This is based on, they have two kids. If they're going to put the child in an activity, they're going to split it in half. But then we have an exception in the event that the parents department able to come to an agreement, then the parent who wishes to still enroll the child in the activity can do so. But then they're a hundred percent responsible for the costs. Now, if you remember back with the mediate or with the parenting plan, they have to mutually agree on the extra curriculum. But if they can't agree, then one parent can put the child in the extra curricular, but the other, but the non-consenting parent does not have to allow for them to participate on their time. So let's say, for example, it's an individual sport. Okay. I had this mediation where dad wanted the child in TaeKwonDo. Mom was adamantly against TaeKwonDo. And we talked about the why behind the watch. It was like, you know, in a previous episode, we talked about the Lennon, right? We talked about the why behind the, what mom did not want the child in TaeKwonDo because she didn't want her baby to get hit or touched by anybody. She was afraid he would get hurt. Also. She thought that it was teaching violence and she's like, I don't want my child exposed to that type of violence. Dad, on the other hand said, I want my child in TaeKwonDo because it will help with his confidence level. It will help him interact with other children. It'll help him understand dedication and authority and structure. Okay? Both of them have valid arguments. Mom is still against them so fine. She doesn't have to pay for it, but dad can. So dad enrolled the child and the child is now going to participate, but dad's got to pay a hundred percent. But according to the parenting plan, remember, mom does not have to let the child participate on her day. If she doesn't want to. And dad can't give the child permission to engage in an activity when the child is scheduled to be with the other parents. So they had the two to five live schedule, or dad had Monday, Tuesday, mom had Wednesday, Thursday, and they alternated weekends. Well guess when practice was Tuesday and Thursday, well, that meant one of the days was dads. And one of the days was moms for practice. Well, mom didn't have to take the child on Thursday, but is that really in the child's best interest because now the child is doing what he wanted to do, but either it's infringing on mom's time created a liability or the child now is grading this good guy, bad guy complex with the child of dad lets me mom. So to avoid all of that, that's why we have all these rules. Dad enrolled the child in TaeKwonDo, talk to the director and was able, instead of doing 30 minutes on Tuesday and 30 minutes on Thursday was able to do an hour on Tuesday. And so the child was able to do it. Mom didn't agree to it. So mom didn't have to pay for it. Dad had to pay a hundred percent, but it couldn't interfere with mom's time where this doesn't work Sidney. And I don't know if you, did you ever do group sports or do you ever do sports? Yeah, I did. Um,

Sydney Mitchell: 20:34

Okay. Let me think in elementary school. Well, let's go like middle school. I did, I was in dance for three years and so we had dance practice. I feel like, I mean three to four days a week. So it was, it definitely infringing on, on both of my parents time. And they, you know, must've come to an agreement on that, uh, in high school. I mean, by the time I was driving, I did volleyball. I did volleyball before I could drive. Um, when I was younger, I did like art club. I was like that girl that tried absolutely everything in elementary school. I was in art club. I did Baton and cheerleading. So yeah, I was, I was that child that was in extracurriculars all

Matthew Brickman: 21:10

Of the time. Okay. So you mentioned volleyball. So group sports, like what would that dad did? And my example with an individual sport that can work well where it doesn't work well as a group sports cheerleading, if you're doing dance, not solo, but if you're doing with people where again, you would also have, uh, you know, rehearsals, practice shows whatnot, but like volleyball, you brought that up. Volleyball, soccer, football, basketball, baseball, lacrosse, rugby. I mean, you take all those groups sports. This is almost impossible because especially if the parents are alternating weekends, you've got games on weekends. Well, so it's important that, that the parents do come together best interests of the child and figure it out because for an individual sport, this can work for group sports. It makes it very difficult because look, if they've got practice twice a week and a game on the weekend, right? And one of the parents refuse to take the child to practice and every other week refuses to play, let them play the game that doesn't work. It wastes money. And the child is just, you know, suffering. It is important that the parties do focus like everything else, the parenting plan, all of this as a best interest of the child when it comes to mutually agreed upon extracurricular activities. Okay. So the last, the last extra for child support is any reasonable or necessary. Those are two important words, reasonable and necessary. It's not mutually agreed, it's reasonable and necessary uninsured or unreimbursed, medical, dental, optical, psychological orthodontic prescription costs are divided by the parents. This is generally done by program, according to the child support guidelines worksheet. It's not just a 50 50 split. Uh, because again, it's tied to the medical and remember that medical is part of the child support, right? So if there's anything that, you know, just a basic monthly, uh, medical insurance doesn't cost, well, then they've got to pay for it, but it's reasonable and necessary. So let's say for example, that a, a 14 year old girl she's, you know, being bullied at school, comes home and says, Hey mom, um, I need a nose job because she'd been bullied at school. And so yeah, she wants to know shop. Is it reasonable and necessary? It's not medically necessary. It's you know, is it reasonable maybe, but is it medically? No, it's not medically necessary. So, you know, mom goes to dad, Hey, um, you know, little, little Jenny wants a nose job and dad's like, uh, no, not paying for it. Well then guess what? Now it's reasonable necessary. Now let's say that Jenny is playing volleyball and she gets hit in the face and breaks her nose. Okay. Reasonable in essence, like different, different scenario. Right. Um, I will tell you a story that happened to me, um, where my son had a pair of glasses. Um, why I ever bought a child? I don't remember how old he was. 7, 8, 9, 10, somewhere around there. Why ever bought a child wire rim glasses is beyond me, but we did. Um, and so he had wiring glasses and, um, you know, just as, you know, kids don't really take care of everything we give them, um, like, you know, as adults, we may baby our stuff, Polish our car and wash and wax it every other day, you know, keep it in the garage. Nobody sits at it except for the driver, you know? Um, so he, um, his glasses were bent. We kept going and getting them straightened, um, and replaced a couple of nose guards, but they were scratched, oh my gosh, they were scratched so bad. This poor little boy could barely see through that. I mean, they were just bad. And so, you know, it to the point where he was saying data, I mean, I, it, it's hard to see. And so I'm like, okay, well we need to get new glasses then fine. So I contacted my access that, Hey, um, we needed to get new glasses for Matthew. And she was like, I'm not, I'm not paying for that. I'm like, uh, it's reasonable necessary. Yes you are. So I'm not saying he doesn't need them. I'm like, well then fine. I'm getting, and I'll you a bill? Just like the paragraph states. Right. So I went, so I used, I use this a week. We had, at the time we had Florida Medicaid. So we got to, you know, his eye exam was free. We got a major discount on, uh, uh, I think it's, I think his sprains were for eight, which is, I think probably why we got the wire and they just had to pay for, you know, got a discount on the lenses. So anyway, the total bill said, date for a pair of glasses was like$120 or so, which is dirt cheap, you know, for the last man, I wear glasses. I'm not paying much more than that. So it was like$120. So I sent her a receipt for half of it and she refused to pay me. She didn't pay within the 14 days, I gave her a receipt, didn't pay. So I filed a motion for contempt enforcement. We go in front of the court, my ex shows up with a Manila envelope with his old twisted, scratched up glasses as her evidence to the judge that he didn't mind for why he didn't meet a new pair. So, so yeah, the judge was like, so we've got a motion for cadet enforcement for repayment. And we're like, yeah, that's it. Yeah. And, uh, and you know, and I had produced the receipt from Walmart vision center for my son's class. And my, so my ex wife has her journey. She's, she's like, well, you know, I want to present this as evidence, you know, and to Hansen, it's almost comical hands and judge envelope. And the judge opens it up and turns upside down an outfall, these mangled scratched up glasses. This is her evidence like, thank you. You just slammed onto my case. And she says, she says, look, you know, you know, he went out and bought these glasses and my son already had a pair of glasses. Now, she didn't say they were fine. Didn't say that they were from that, that he could see perfectly. She said, and he already had a pair of glasses. The judge opens up the, the, uh, the glasses, you know, the earpieces and holds them off to look through the lenses. And they're just scratch all the place. And she holds them up to look through them and she puts them down, goes, man, are you serious? She goes, I can't even see through these glasses. And she said, sir, where did you get the glasses? I said, well, if you take a look at the receipt, they was like$120. And it was at Walmart. And I'm asking for, you know, 50% reimbursement, you know,$60 now keep in mind saving. We had already been back and forth in and out of court constantly for the child support rearage for her not paying child support. Right. So she already owed thousands of dollars. I'm just, I'm, I'm just continually just trying to seek and see if I can get anything. Like, are you willing to contribute financially to these children that you actually bore and brought into this world? So the judge orders said, I find it reasonably necessary. I go to the pan is 60 miles. Right. But yeah, I mean, it was reasonable and necessary. So you use common sense people reasonable and necessary. Okay. So once we get through all of that, we get to the next section. It says, based upon the time sharing the party's income and other statutory factors, child support is whatever it is monthly. So, so of course we get that number from the child support guidelines, worksheet, that baseline child support. And then we have the language that says it's continuing. And we w sitting, we've modified this all the time. You know, where maybe it's on the first day of each month, maybe it's, maybe we don't even put what day we just say in accordance the father or the mother, you know, whoever's paying child support with their pay set schedule, or maybe it's the fifth and the 20th of each month. However, I mean, we know what the monthly child support is. And then we talked about, okay, when it's due and it's, you know, viewing oh, in each month until modified by court order, the child turns 18 becomes emancipated, marries, dies, otherwise become self-supporting. Or if the child is between the ages of 18 to 19, still in high school, performing good faith with a reasonable expectation of graduation for the age of 19, then child support will continue until the child graduates from high school. So a lot of papers. So again, it depends on what state you're in. So if you're not in the state of Florida and you're listening to this podcast, you know, find out what, what, what, what the laws in your state, some states Sydney child support goes until the child, uh, graduates college or child sports, even through college. Um, wow. Did I did a Canadian divorce a number of years ago? I don't know if the laws changed, but it was funny. They actually use the word magical in their statute. I don't, I don't know. Mickey mouse had a hand in drafting that, but they use the word magical. And they said just because a child turns a magical age does not alleviate the parental responsibility to support the child. I mean, from a moral standpoint, it makes sense. You know, if I'm the one paying child support, uh, no, I don't want to back to that, because guess when it went to, it said child support will continue until the child is fully self-supporting. I mean, I could be good. Yeah. I mean, wait one, and we've got, we've got, you know, I mean, if you, if anybody takes any look at 2020 in the United States of America and with what was going on with, you know, you know, these riots and Antifa and all of this stuff, you've got these adults that are still sleeping on mommy and daddy's rough still. And it's like, how old are you? Like you're funding your criminal activity by still staying at your parents? Like, like, for example, even my son, I love my son. He's 23, still living with his mom. Right. Like, okay. So child support would S he'll be like, you're 23 and you're still like, my son's not fully. Self-supported like, how old is, like, how long has child support going? No, I think there's an absolutely needs to be a drop dead cut off. Like, you're done, get out you're on your own. Right. Um, but in Florida, it's either when the child turns 18 becomes emancipated. Of course, if they get married, then you can't even climb over a tax deduction if they die. Unfortunately, I'm sorry. That's not good. Um, if they become self-supporting so fine, you know, they ended up getting a job and there's fully supporting themselves. They're self-supporting um, or, and this is Sydney. This is the biggest thing. Because for example, my daughter, um, did not graduate high school until after she was 18. She was between 18 and 19 when she graduated. Right. Because she turned 18 in December and graduated high school then in may. Yeah. The

Sydney Mitchell: 32:57

Same thing is true for me. I turned, um, yeah, I turned 18 in January and then graduated six months later.

Matthew Brickman: 33:03

So if you were 18, just because you turned that magical age doesn't mean child support stops. If you're still in high school, performing phase with a reasonable expectation of graduated before 19, then it goes into graduation. So like, in your case, or like, in my daughter's case, then it's not the birthday 18 is when you graduate high school, then child comes last. Yeah. Then, then child support stops. Um, so the other thing that we have to have put in this paragraph, um, is if there was no substantial time sharing child support would be X, um, at the time of executing this agreement. So for example, let's, let's just say, for example, that the parties have a 50, 50 timeshare, and let's say the child support is a hundred dollars a month, right? Just because, you know, um, one of them makes a little bit more money than the other. So if there was no time timeshare, they did not have substantial shared. If they didn't get to that 20% threshold, then we have to run this so that everyone is aware of. If you don't exercise your time sharing, this is worst case scenario, which is the most child support that you could be on the hook for. So pay attention, pay your child, support, exercise, your sharing, follow the rules. And this sentence will never come into play, but at least in the event, everybody knows, well, if you're not exercising your time sharing and you don't have substantial shared will, then child support is$700 a month instead of$100. So we put that in Occasionally Sydney and I will be releasing Q& A bonus episodes where we will answer questions and give you a personal shout out

Sydney Mitchell: 34:42

If you have a comment or question regarding anything that we discuss, email us at info@ichatmediation.com that's info@ichatmediation.com and stay tuned to hear your shout out and have your question answered here on the show.

Matthew Brickman: 34:59

For more information about my services or to schedule your mediation with me, either in person or using my iChatMediation Virtual Platform built by Cisco Communications. Visit me online at www.iMediateInc.com. Call me at 561-262-9121, Toll-Free at 877-822-1479 or email me at MBrickman@iChatMediation.com.